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Pressed: 52 Weeks Begin Now: Week 30: Staying in the Spiritual Fire

28 Jun

52 Weeks Begin Now: Week 30: Staying in the Spiritual Fire.

windows

Stay in the Spiritual Fire
Let it cook you
Be a well-baked loaf,
and lord of the table.
You’ve been a source of pain,
Now you’ll be the delight.

Rumi

Hitting the Edges: Charlotte Kasl (1999) reminds me of the courage that it takes to be in an intimate relationship. “New love is a rich time for the spiritual warrior” (p. 34) who is willing to accept the dance of openness. When we allow ourselves to connect with our essence, and let go of our masques, “[o]ur growth begins..as we face parts of ourselves that have always been there” (p. 36). As we unmasque ourselves, we get closer to the essence of who we are and why we are here, and what we seek in our intimate relationships.

Often, the relationships that matter and the ones that we should continue, are those that help us “hit our edges”. They are the ones where we get scared, but learn to face the fears in partnership. “We may hit an edge when someone hurts us, or when someone loves us more than we love ourselves. It is sometimes harder for many people to allow love to pierce their hearts” than to continue in busyness, chaos and distraction. “When people hit an edge, they usually run away by going numb, distracting themselves, changing the subject, counter-attacking, overindulging in addictions or blaming…Remember, love brings up anything that’s hiding. [As well], [w]e sometimes tell ourselves the story that because life was easy before we met a lover, our anxiety and agitation is the fault of our new partner, or not being a good match…” (p. 18 and p. 37). Sometimes we need to be in relationship to open ourselves up for spiritual growth, and that is not always an easy process.

Finding Voice: I remember reading Parker Palmer in his book Let Your Life Speak (1999) about finding our authentic voices. He stirred in me the importance of being true to ourselves. He encouraged us to not get caught up in lying about who we are so that we can gain approval. When we are speaking with integrity to ourselves and others, we resonate with joy in our hearts. We fill ourselves and others with strength and security, and not with anxiety.

In contrast, the lies that we sometimes tell ourselves and others distance ourselves from our spiritual path and from those with whom we might be destined to spend our time “…cultivating a garden together…digging beneath the hard and crusty surface to the rich humus of our lives” (Palmer, 1999). It is important for people interested in authentic relationships to dig deeply into what truly matters, and make our way through the years of debris that hid us from ourselves and others. When we finally find it, we are compelled to look up out of the darkness and into the sun. We then have an opportunity to raise our arms up to the sky and sing into the light with the joy of the experience.

Courage: Being willing to stay in the spiritual fire takes courage and a strong belief that we are worthy of that which can bring us closer to our truth. If we are always standing on the outside looking in, and analyzing what can, might or does go wrong, it is difficult to connect with another soul. Being present with another, when all things seem impossible, not only takes courage, but it also takes some help from the universe. We need to appreciate when the universe has intervened, and appreciate the good fortune of finding a strong companion willing to ask what needs to be done so that we are warmed, not burned, by this spiritual fire that we are in together.

It takes the courage to open the different doors where potential soul mates are knocking. Which knock is the right knock? It takes some time and some loving discernment to see past any illusion or ego that might hamper our ability to find the right partner. “Allowing [ourselves] to be shaken to [our] roots is a source of a growing relationship” (Kasl, 1999, p. 172); however, in this challenging journey of intimacy, time usually teaches us who will bend in the wind. Time shows us who will revel in and not hide from the simplicities and complexities of an intimate connection. However, finding true intimacy is a bit of a universal gamble. If found and embraced, it can help us grow into our best selves if we make it our priority to do the work of the spiritual warrior.

Gamble everything for love…
Half-heartedness doesn’t reach into majesty.
You set out to find God,
but then you keep stopping for long periods
at mean-spirited roadhouses.
Don’t wait any longer.
Dive in the ocean,
leave and let the sea be you…

Rumi

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52 Weeks Begin Now: Week 30: Staying in the Spiritual Fire

28 Jun

windows

Stay in the Spiritual Fire
Let it cook you
Be a well-baked loaf,
and lord of the table.
You’ve been a source of pain,
Now you’ll be the delight.

Rumi

Hitting the Edges: Charlotte Kasl (1999) reminds me of the courage that it takes to be in an intimate relationship. “New love is a rich time for the spiritual warrior” (p. 34) who is willing to accept the dance of openness. When we allow ourselves to connect with our essence, and let go of our masques, “[o]ur growth begins..as we face parts of ourselves that have always been there” (p. 36). As we unmasque ourselves, we get closer to the essence of who we are and why we are here, and what we seek in our intimate relationships.

Often, the relationships that matter and the ones that we should continue, are those that help us “hit our edges”. They are the ones where we get scared, but learn to face the fears in partnership. “We may hit an edge when someone hurts us, or when someone loves us more than we love ourselves. It is sometimes harder for many people to allow love to pierce their hearts” than to continue in busyness, chaos and distraction. “When people hit an edge, they usually run away by going numb, distracting themselves, changing the subject, counter-attacking, overindulging in addictions or blaming…Remember, love brings up anything that’s hiding. [As well], [w]e sometimes tell ourselves the story that because life was easy before we met a lover, our anxiety and agitation is the fault of our new partner, or not being a good match…” (p. 18 and p. 37). Sometimes we need to be in relationship to open ourselves up for spiritual growth, and that is not always an easy process.

Finding Voice: I remember reading Parker Palmer in his book Let Your Life Speak (1999) about finding our authentic voices. He stirred in me the importance of being true to ourselves. He encouraged us to not get caught up in lying about who we are so that we can gain approval. When we are speaking with integrity to ourselves and others, we resonate with joy in our hearts. We fill ourselves and others with strength and security, and not with anxiety.

In contrast, the lies that we sometimes tell ourselves and others distance ourselves from our spiritual path and from those with whom we might be destined to spend our time “…cultivating a garden together…digging beneath the hard and crusty surface to the rich humus of our lives” (Palmer, 1999). It is important for people interested in authentic relationships to dig deeply into what truly matters, and make our way through the years of debris that hid us from ourselves and others. When we finally find it, we are compelled to look up out of the darkness and into the sun. We then have an opportunity to raise our arms up to the sky and sing into the light with the joy of the experience.

Courage: Being willing to stay in the spiritual fire takes courage and a strong belief that we are worthy of that which can bring us closer to our truth. If we are always standing on the outside looking in, and analyzing what can, might or does go wrong, it is difficult to connect with another soul. Being present with another, when all things seem impossible, not only takes courage, but it also takes some help from the universe. We need to appreciate when the universe has intervened, and appreciate the good fortune of finding a strong companion willing to ask what needs to be done so that we are warmed, not burned, by this spiritual fire that we are in together.

It takes the courage to open the different doors where potential soul mates are knocking. Which knock is the right knock? It takes some time and some loving discernment to see past any illusion or ego that might hamper our ability to find the right partner. “Allowing [ourselves] to be shaken to [our] roots is a source of a growing relationship” (Kasl, 1999, p. 172); however, in this challenging journey of intimacy, time usually teaches us who will bend in the wind. Time shows us who will revel in and not hide from the simplicities and complexities of an intimate connection. However, finding true intimacy is a bit of a universal gamble. If found and embraced, it can help us grow into our best selves if we make it our priority to do the work of the spiritual warrior.

Gamble everything for love…
Half-heartedness doesn’t reach into majesty.
You set out to find God,
but then you keep stopping for long periods
at mean-spirited roadhouses.
Don’t wait any longer.
Dive in the ocean,
leave and let the sea be you…

Rumi